You might know Busara O'Reilly as the owner of Ghetto BABE Street EATS, in the Star Court Arcade on Lismore's CBD. She's also worked at Benchtop Espresso and Alphadale 561.

What you might not know about Busara is the incredible and harrowing story of her life - growing up in poverty in Thailand, before coming to a better life in Australia.

Busara spoke to Denise Alison of Humans of Lismore about her life to bring your this week's Sunday Profile.

Busara - “ I was born in Phuket, Thailand to a Mafia father who was shot by the Police. My Mum was his 5th wife. He had all sons and I was the only daughter. My first memory from my childhood is running along the beach and I could hear gunshots. I always thought it was a recurring dream until many years later, I asked my mum about that memory.

She said, ’Do you remember that?’ I was 2 years old and she was carrying me, we were running away from corrupt Police who wanted to take over the Mafia industry. My Dad was a drug lord and ran the red light district. He was a very bad man. My Mum was a drug mule without really knowing that she was.

They killed off my whole family. They went to America and killed my brothers, all my six brothers were shot and killed. My father's first wife ran away to a temple and became a nun so she survived. My mother also became a nun so they couldn’t touch her there. I was given to my Grandmother up at the Nakon Patom at the age of 2 and that’s where I grew up.

I lived with my Grandmother and Grandfather and we were really, really poor. There were 20 people living in our house. My grandparents, my aunty and uncle with their 5 kids and their grandkids as well. There were curtains separating the rooms.

Poverty

The house would often flood and we would walk along planks to get to our beds. I only had 2 sets of clothes. It was so horrible.

My grandmother was a fisherwoman and she was really nasty to me because she hated girls. She is still alive and she loves me now but back then I was a burden. My grandfather used to craft things for the locals. 

When my mother left I didn’t see her for two years. She didn’t come back for me till I was 4. I was left for two years with my grandmother who didn’t love me.

She would go fishing early in the morning and leave me outside all day. I remember it being dark and cold and she would leave me on this plank of wood outside the house with a bowl of rice and fish sauce.

That’s all I ate for 2 years. I was left all day on my own all the time so a lot of bad shit happened during those days. From 2 to 4 years old I was fending for myself on a daily basis. 

I got taken by some village boys and they did stuff to me. I remember coming home one day, I was 4 years old and I was bleeding everywhere.

My Grandad cleaned me up. In Thailand, we used big pots of water to shower but because I was so sore and dirty I jumped in the whole pot. My Grandmother saw me and hit me quite badly after that.

That was tough. I remember my mum came to visit me when I was 5 and she gave me a doll. I was so angry and broken by that time I threw the doll on the ground. I wanted nothing from her.

She said ‘In a years time I am going to take you to a better life, we are going to Australia.’ 

Australia

We came to Australia when I was 6. I had really long hair and before I came she cleaned me up and shaved off my hair because I had nits.

I remember crying all the way to Australia because all my hair was gone. I arrived here in 1986 and I couldn’t speak a word of English.

My mum would say ‘Say hello to Bill’ which is my stepdad and I would say ‘Say Hello Bill’ I said ‘Say’ in front of everything.

I had to go to language school in Fairfield, Melbourne. I went to Fairfield Primary School and everything was amazing.

I was here in Australia, I had a stepfather who absolutely adored me.

My favourite colour was purple so he painted my room purple. I had a real bed. This is the land of the free. This is paradise!

That’s why nothing gets me down anymore I just say to myself ’Just get up, you’re not dead so get up.’ That’s why I have this drive.

Having 4 kids and running businesses, I’m living the dream. Going through that and surviving, I could have become a prostitute, I could have been kidnapped or killed along with my father.

I changed my name from my previous father's name to my now stepfather's name in 1996 which is O’Reilly. 

Lismore

I came to Lismore 13 years ago with my ex Peter. I met Peter in Melbourne. He was a cute Chef and working for my best friend.

I was a waitress and we ended up together. We became pregnant with Dexter when Pete’s father was dying.

He said I’m not dying until I meet my first grandchild. Dexter was born prematurely at just under 32 weeks. When Dexter was born Peter’s father had already been in hospital, so sick, and we couldn’t leave the hospital with our baby for 8 weeks because he was so tiny. Pete’s Dad was still hanging in there.

We got out of hospital after the 8 weeks was up, flew to Kyogle the next morning and took Dexter to meet his Grandad. Dad died the next morning.

If Dexter had gone full term he would never have met his grandfather.

Pete's mum was now on her own after being married for 45 years so we decided we wanted to be closer to family and make a life for ourselves up here.

We didn’t want to live in Kyogle, coming from Melbourne. I had always been a city girl except for Thailand but I forget about Thailand now.

I had never seen cows in the street before, no traffic lights and only one cafe. I got dressed up in my finest clothes and trotted down the streets of Kyogle in my high heels with my bright red pram and all I saw were cows on the road.

I was on the phone crying to my friend…I can’t see any shops, can’t see cafes and there’s cow shit on the road.

I had no car, a baby, everyone was in mourning from Dad passing, I had no friends, my first baby in this country town and I was keeping it together but missing Melbourne.

I thought, Ok we’ve made this decision together, pick yourself up, you’re here. We stayed in Kyogle for 6 months before moving to Alstonville for a year then Goonellabah.

Work in Lismore

At that time the Quilky’s had just taken over The Richmond Hotel in Lismore. There was a sign up, Head Chef and staff wanted and they had just built Miss Lizzies so that’s how we met John and Carol. Pete built their kitchen and we were there for 4 years.

Pete as Head Chef and I was working there as well. Five years later we had Alphadale Restaurant and then 5 years later we opened Cafe One One Four in Keen St.

We split up not long after due to the pressure of the business. During those years we had 3 more children. Two years after Dexter we had Suki. Six years later we had Jackson and 18 months later we had Pixie. 

I took a break from One One Four for a couple of years and I decided to open my own place. This is my industry, my passion and my town. I’ve had this dream for a long time.

My new partner who is amazing invested in me and decided it was my time. He wanted to support my dream. He custom-built everything in this cafe to suit me.

Ghetto Babe

He came up with the Ghetto Babe name because I am the ghetto babe. It’s in an arcade, we are going to make the laneway into outdoor dining and because I grew up in a ghetto it suits.

I’m also a Hip Hop RnB girl so I play 90’s RnB tunes constantly. This is the food I grew up with. All the women in my family were cooks or chefs so it’s in my blood.

I’m in South Lismore now and loving it. Cute street, we know all our neighbours, all homeowners and we’re a tight-knit family.

I feel like this is me giving back to the community that has always supported me. I love this community, I love Lismore.”

Busara - 3 years later, with an updated life journey:

“Ok! Stepping back in time, coming off the 3 years I’ve been here. It’s been extremely hard. I’m the mother of 4 beautiful children I share with my ex-partner, 2 teenagers and 2 still in primary school.

It’s been tough without a business partner or life partner. Also without parents or family and my Melbourne mates. 

I haven’t had the support of family but I’ve had support from my community and a great circle of friends here. The community of Lismore have been my saving grace so I’d like to say thank you firstly to my community for supporting me throughout the 17 years I’ve been here now.

I feel like I’m pretty much a Lismorian. Can I say that now? I used to be a Melbournite but now I feel very much a Lismore girl. 

During those years I’ve had businesses in town. The first restaurant was 561 Alphadale with my ex, then we opened Cafe 114 which is now the Benchtop Cafe.

After the father of my children and I separated I worked at a local hotel in the restaurant. It was hard working for someone else after having my own business but I was grateful for the work. The owners were pretty much like my parents as I don’t have my parents here. Things went down there though which weren’t good.

There was an incident in that job that wasn’t good and the outcome wasn’t fair and I had to leave. I didn’t want people to say poor Busara.

I’ve worked really hard and I need to be strong for my kids. I didn’t want people to say..Let’s support her because she’s Asian and a single mum. I fought it quietly and then I opened this (Ghetto Babe Street Eats).

There have been many times the town of Lismore has kept me sane. There are so many good people in our community. I’m a mother, a business owner and a woman so I can’t fail. I’ve worked too hard. 

I’ve been picked up by Gathar Catering since COVID. The second year of opening Ghetto Babe Covid hit.

We stayed open the whole time doing takeaways and feeding the essential workers. I had to change my whole business within 3 days. I couldn’t get Jobkeeper or Jobseeker for any of my workers.

I had 7 staff before Covid but they all went because of uncertain times. My car had just been stolen as well.

They had crashed it in South Grafton and blew the car up. People were giving me lifts to work then when Covid hit, no more lifts or cabs so I was walking to work with my son. It was the hardest, darkest time.

During that time my Nanna whom I loved so much passed away. I wasn’t able to see her in Melbourne due to Covid. She saw the news and believed the world was ending so she starved herself. Two weeks later my aunty died.

Only 10 people were allowed at her funeral. If you read my first story on HOL you will see my Thai grandma was so cruel and abusive to me. She would beat me with a bamboo stick when I was tiny. When I first arrived here in Australia my English nanna Dorothy O’Reilly took me in and she showed me kindness.

She gave me so much warmth and love. She would make me cups of tea. For me, not to be able to pay my respects and say goodbye to her just broke me. That’s what Covid did to people. We weren’t allowed to be with our loved ones. My Nanna arrived here when she was heavily pregnant and 3 kids, one of which was my Dad on board.

She changed me from an angry little person to someone who believed that there is still goodness and love in the world. I really miss her.  

I’m still here, I have 3 staff and I’m about to get a liquor licence. I’m going strong. I’m not going anywhere.

I want to give it my all. I’ve lived in this country almost my whole life. I love this town so much and I love the people who make up this community.

People need to know that racism is still happening in our town. It’s happening behind closed doors. I want to protect others who may not be as strong as me. I’ve copped heaps but I’m never giving up.

At the end of the day, Lismore is where I want to be. Be kind to each other.”